The 🄼🄴 i like the most. so relaxed. so sweaty. so in love with trying to enjoy my days instead of just going through the motions, which i fall into way too easily. trying is what matters and i know we’re all trying. && i want you to know how proud i am of you. that. and us ♡
Finally settled into my new place and i’m just so :) sometimes, self care is finding new bedding you’re actually excited to lay in, then actually putting it on. it’s these little mindful moments that mean the most to me☁️
I’m the girl who always says ‘i don’t have boobs’ out of insecurity. i actually have them. i'm embracing my beautiful 34aa✨. i see so many fuller chests all over the media that i forget to adore my own. before today, i’ve really avoided wearing bras because i could never fill a cup, so i felt ‘too small.’ or the band feels much too tight and squeezes my body in a way that makes me feel ’too much’ for the size. i don’t want to wear a bra that makes me feel like i need to change. #toeachherown, right?
i want a bra that fits me. @thirdlove has 70 sizes and even makes half sizes so that no beautiful b*****s feel left behind. wearing a bra that makes me feel comfortable in my own body is something i never thought i’d never find. and years ago, i truly gave up.
thanks for letting me share #mythirdlove story :)
♡ what’s your bra story? #ad
The 𝐌𝐢𝐬𝐬 𝐀𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐚 pageant popped up on tv tonight and all i pictured was 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢 𝚐𝚒𝚛𝚕 watching and comparing herself.. i feel like i should share my story and i hope that’s okay.
i’ve done 2 pageants and they gifted me the best & worst times of my life. winning my 1st was a chance to sing, win a scholarship, and chance to make a difference in chicago’s asian american community. but, it was also the perfect time for my eating disorder to come back, and in a different form. i did everything to look the way i believed i had to in order to win.
𝐈 𝐝𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐮𝐥𝐢𝐦𝐢𝐚. for the first time in my life, i forced myself to expel what i consumed.
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐬𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐝. i felt so alone & blamed myself for ‘letting’ this get so ‘bad.’ i was lying to myself about my health and my mental struggle.
𝘐𝘵’𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘮𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘪 𝘸𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦. growing up, i was so insecure about my body and had such a horrible relationship with food. i vividly remember my 10 year old self… my grade school crush calling me ‘chubby’ and this was the tipping point: i stopped eating.
✨the point of this is, i don’t want us to be nervous to talk about these things. i don’t want us to feel shame surrounding struggle. and most of all, i hope that we stop comparing ourselves to the glitz and glamour we see.
𝙣𝙤 𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙛𝙚𝙘𝙩. and you do not need to be what you perceive as ‘perfect.’
𝙋𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚, focus on loving who and what you are right now. let yourself embrace your natural self.
strive to 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙡 good, not just look good.
and make sure that you care about your health, mentally, emotionally & physically, above all else.
it’s not easy to talk about this, and i feel really vulnerable.. but maybe someone needs to hear it🖤i love you.
I got the job!!! gah, i’m s0o happy :)
i’ve been an academic researcher at a university for three years since graduating in 2015, now i’m officially a projector coordinator - eek! college was a really harsh time in my life. my eating disorder and depression ate away at me, i had a hard time making friends and all i did was work, intern, study and pay off loans. i know what it’s like to be lost and feel like you’re just drowning.. the best advice i can try to give you is: take care of yourself first (mentally, emotionally, physically) and i promise, you’ll find your way. love you 💕 thanks for letting me share with u, especially parts of my life i never do
what’s your life like ?
job? school? tell me :)
Hugs from myself are the best🌻and it’s not just the corny ‘hug yourself, then you love yourself’ type of thing.. but really, i feel like i’m just with myself so much more these days, in every moment.
when i’m feeling really sad, stressed, down about my body.. i don’t run away from myself and turn to food anymore. i don’t refuse to feel any feelings and decide to run to someone else to make me feel better. i try to hold my body close and say:
💬i’m with you
💬i’m here for you
💬let me love you
might seem corny, kinda feels corny to even type this.. but it’s such a beautiful relationship i’ve always wanted. and i didn’t have to ditch myself to find it 💛
skort from @showpo
Geez, my gums show when i smile this big :)
🍕giveaway time🍕 @realgoodfoods and i want to gift you a $75 gift card to spend on any of their yumz! they reached and i love doing giveaways for you all❤️they make delicious, adorable gluten & grain-free mini pizzas & enchiladas with no preservatives. and really, it’s just so nice to enjoy something yummy when you typically have to avoid so much because of intolerances, allergies, whatever you got, ya know?
🍕to enter, just:
•tag 2 friends
winner has been messaged - love you!
I always thought i needed to ‘fix’ myself, but i just needed to find myself.
three years ago, i didn’t realize my struggles were not just about food & my body. i thought fighting for the ‘perfect’ diet & body became a passion. but frankly, it became my escape & turned into an obsession.
i know why: at age 10, i was anorexic and my relationship with myself never recovered. with no one to talk to and no idea what was happening, i had no choice but to ‘restore my weight’ for doctors and move on. but, i couldn’t just ‘move on.’ at this point in the left photo, the nonstop cycle of binge eating, guilt and exercise took over every part of me. i became a shell of a person; rarely leaving my apartment and trying to get straight a’s in college while balancing two jobs and an internship. i was desperate to be viewed as successful, ‘perfect’ but each day i woke up still feeling like a failure and went to bed with regret.
*this 3 year shift has nothing to do with my body, but everything to do with my mind.
*nothing matters more than being honest, open and loving with your own self.
*remember to never shame yourself into changing.
♡you are worthy of love,
and you’re worthy of hearing all of this from yourself every d**n day. give yourself a chance to find what you need and want, and really, it’s already in you :)