One of the most important lessons to integrate when on the path to high quality love and partnership is learning to look for the qualities that showcase someone's capacity to be a great partner.
people who are attuned to your needs (in a respectful and non obtrusive way) are the ones who are capable of actually supporting the underlying emotional needs we all have, which is the stable foundation from which a solid partnership can be built.
genuine support and love looks like someone who is secure in themselves, respectfully attends to their needs, communicates clearly and is positively responsive to the contributions of others.
in other words they have developed a beautiful synergy between independence and interdependence, between alone time and together time, between their fundamental needs and making space for another's needs to co-exist, between giving love and receiving love, between remaining connected to themselves while still being able to maintain healthy and secure connections with others.
those who genuinely love and support you want to see you win, reguardless of the form of relationship you share.
friendship is often a great place to learn to get aquainted with this new standard of high quality relating and support.
if we desire legendary connections we have to go where the love is, and move towards those who have done the work to remain open and self aware, with healthy boundaries.
but if our wound patterns are still doing the choosing, we'll miss those high quality connections while chasing after the people who aren't yet equipped to stay the journey.
we can still have relationships with these individuals but they will likely end up in the push pull dynamic where the wounding pattern reopens, and when this happens our worth takes a hit, simply because we chose someone who didn't have the skillset and experience in being emotionally attuned themselves and emotionally responsive to others.
if we're paying attention we can pick up this information within the first month or two of meeting/dating.
how things go often depend on how they begin, so begin powerfully by choosing those who show up fully right from the start.